About Us

The origins of Screamer has 2 stories. There is much debate between scholars as to which version is correct. We have included both versions so that you can decide.

Version 1

Screamer Sex Swings is run by Scott and Angela. Having sold a business in 2013, they were left with an empty shop and no income. The only thing remaining from the old business was 2 pieces of equipment that work with webbing that were very expensive… and on a 5 year lease they had to pay for anyway.

So naturally, when looking at the situation, no income and the ability to work well with webbing, they decided to form a sex swing company. With no jobs, there was a lot of time for testing these new products.

Things just fell into place and the Screamer was born.

Version 2

The Screamer Sex Swing has been years in the making…. Here is our story.

Once upon a time, in a land far, far away, there lived  young couple. And they were in love LUST. Their sex lives were great. They were a fairly typical with fairly typical lives. Long walks on the beach follow by sex in the sand. Nice quiet candle light dinners followed by sex on the table. Watching chick flicks at the movies with acting the scenes out while you are in the movies. The stuff of normal relationships.

With the rise of the internet, the young couple became exposed to more radical forms of entertainment. The introduction of internet porn had a profound impact on their lives.  It became a nightly ritual to watch internet “action” movies as their bed time stories, followed by romantic but loud love-making before falling asleep in a hot messy heap.

But all was not well in this happy life of love LUST. Eventually, the internet “action” movies brought about tension for the young couple. As it turns out, there are positions that girls were able to perform on the internet that they were not able to duplicate at home. This caused a great deal of fighting in their relationship.

The young man was angry that his lover would not perform these great tricks for him. He felt as though he was missing something in his life and his mind started to wander to the younger and hotter girls on the internet that could perform these miraculous feats of physical strength and flexibility.

Meanwhile the young lady started growing depressed that her lover was looking elsewhere and wanted to know why she was not good enough. She became very disappointed in her body letting her down and she started crying herself to sleep each night… “Oh god!, please give me the strength to perform for my man so he does not leave me”.

This continues for many dark months. It appeared that all was lost. One night as the young lady peered from her bedroom window, she saw a shooting star, (Actually it was the meteor that exploded over Russia) and she made a wish. “I wish to the powers of lust and love that I have the skills to perform, I wish someone would help me”

When she completed her wish, to her amazement, her fairy godmother arrived.

“It’s ok dear, I know, I know, I have seen this all before. Some ladies just do not have the skills that their men expect. Some ladies can just not perform the way they do on the internet”. The fairy godmother said.

“But how do I convince my lover of this? He saw it on the internet and thinks it is all real. He saw the girls screaming in orgasm and shaking uncontrollably. I want to do that for him how do I scream in joy and do these impossible positions?” She asked.

And with a flick of her wand, the fairy godmother made a one-of-a-kind sex swing appear. (Thankfully, for the young lady, it was a door mount version because she could not screw into the ceiling of her rental apartment.)

“This should do the trick. With that, I can make you both scream in Ecstasy so I dub that ‘The Screamer'” her fairy godmother declared.  “And now no more crying. No more letting your man down. From now on, you are like the ladies on the internet. This will give you the strength and flexibility to perform like and AVN starlet!” And with that, the fairy godmother disappeared.

Very excited, the young lady could not wait to try it out and quickly raced over to wake her partner. He really did not move. So to speed things up she slipped under the covers and performed a little magic…. (skipping ahead here)

Finally she had him positioned under the Screamer and she had the squatting attachment hooked up and she lowered herself down on him and then proceeded to bounce up and down like a porn star.

Really – it was a pretty amazing thing. They both screamed in pleasure so loud all night long it woke the neighbors.

Now to move the story along, it was not the young lovers LUSTERS that came up with the idea for The Screamer. It was actually an enterprising neighbor. While most neighbors were very angry being kept up all night, there was one neighbor, Abby Woods, that was inspired. Just the sounds of the screaming was enough to bring her to near orgasm. So the next day she inquired about the noises she heard the night before. She had never heard anything that made such a joyous sound.

Upon discovering the new toy that they had been using, she immediately though. “I must have one”.  Well, the problem is that the only place to get one was by way of the fairy godmother and wishing on a once-every-1,000-year meteor, so that was not going to happen.

So the next best thing was to make her own. But being Abby, why just make one person scream when you can make thousands of couples scream with pleasure…. and so was the birth of The Screamer.

The End.

2 Responses to “About Us”

  1. I am going to be buying the dual hook swing.
    How far apart should I mount the Ceiling mounts?

    Thanks

    • The width can vary. My wife prefers about 34-36 inches apart. A little wider seems to be more comfortable for many people. For comparison, most single hook swings, the bar is about 22 inches wide. So 34-36 is pretty wide. Also, depending on the direction of your ceiling joists, you may have your options limited by the spacing. For example if your ceiling is 24 inch on center, then you are left with 24 or 48 inches. If your ceiling is 16 inches on center then you can get 32 inches or 48 inches. If you put your swing in the same direction the joists run, you can use any width.